Why it pays to just be yourself

In the sports, media and acting world that I operate in, everyone knows there is a lot of hot air. People are always quick to name drop or pretend to know people they don’t in the hope it will open some doors for them. For me, that’s just a no go and just not the way to start a relationship – business or otherwise.

As a result, I double down on just being myself (…..as the lovely Dionne Warwick sung). What you see is what you get. And in the main, I feel it has served me well.

Networking is part and parcel of what I do. As a result, I have met some talented and successful people in these professions. But I always take the time to build genuine relationships and I am happy to now call a number of them my friends.

There is one story though that I often think about that feels relevant here. It shows how easily I could have got myself into hot water had I tried to ‘blag’ it.

Most of you will know that I know a few people in the football world (the irony of me saying this here is not lost on me), which started out in the early 1990s. Some of them went on to play for Premiership football clubs and for their country, before progressing to the media world and into management.

Some time ago, I wanted to run personal finance sessions in the Premier league academies and I was introduced to Paul Hart, the Academy Director at Portsmouth (who we interviewed for SKQ13). Portsmouth ended up being my first academy before I went on to run sessions at Fulham, Chelsea and Leeds.

At the time, I knew (and still do) the then Portsmouth Manager and I mentioned this to Paul and the players during my time with them. If I’m honest, I could have just asked the manager to set up my finance sessions with the team. But I didn’t. I wanted to do it my way. I felt I would learn more and get my rewards based on merit and hard graft. I certainly did learn a lot and am very glad I didn’t take the easy route.

One day, I was at a Portsmouth game, in the players’ area before the match and the manager came in. He saw me. He stopped and shook my hand, “Hey Ollie (my nickname), how are you doing? What are you doing here?” (knowing full well that Portsmouth was not my football team). It was a powerful moment. It showed that I don’t  take advantage of the people I know for personal gain. It also showed people that I knew who I said I knew.

But I shudder at the thought of that moment if I hadn’t. The damage that would have done to my relationships with the team at Portsmouth, my reputation and my new business venture. For me, name dropping or trying to fast track your way into a lucrative bit of business is just not the way to go. Be yourself, it’s so important. Because relationships built on honesty are the only thing that really matter. They are worth their weight in gold.